Cows, Sluts, Princesses & Flaws: A Tiny Treatise
by Wanderlustlover
Summary: Cows, Sluts, Princesses & Flaws: A Tiny Treatise on the Teenage Mutant Female. I made this one an AU, because there isn't really a universe where Emma & Jean are in school at the same time, but I ran with it, tossed in Raven, and really loved the idea.


**Cows, Sluts, Princesses & Flaws: A Tiny Treatise on the Teenage Mutant Female**

**Summary: **I made this one an AU, because there isn't really a universe where Emma & Jean are in school at the same time, but I ran with it, tossed in Raven, and really loved the idea.

**Title:** Cows, Sluts, Princesses & Flaws: A Tiny Treatise on the Teenage Mutant Female  
**Author:** wanderlustlover  
**Recipient:** scribble_myname  
**Fandom:** X-Men AU  
**Rating:** PG-13really  
**Author's Notes:** I made this one an AU, because there isn't really a universe where Emma & Jean are in school at the same time, but I loved the idea of it. This became a sort of hodge-podge mixture universe of Comics (for people/timelines) & Movies (mostly First Class) displaying the first bumpy day of your prompt for their "intensely close, highly competitive relationship for Phoenix-powered Jean and Diamond-powered Emma in school".

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_Dear Diary,_

_Jean Grey is a cow._

_After everything Raven had said I expected her to be so much better. Not that Raven always has the best taste in anything. Her wardrobe is a constant reminder of this. But. Not The Point._

_That girl finally showed up this morning, in one of those quaint checkered cabs, of all things. No parents and only one suitcase, like a little orphan and then walked around like she'd come home to her castle. Not to mention the way she simpered endlessly once she spotted Mr. Xavier._

_I've said it a hundred times, this school needs to be bigger. Then I wouldn't have had to see her in all of my classes. Putting herself out, making friends with everyone, boys fawning over her because she's suddenly their the new shiny toy, everyone waiting on her hand and foot and telling her how amazing it was to have her back._

_She could learn to be a little more humble. Know her place. And stop relying on her pedantic history. Who cares if she was here back when the dinosaurs were roaming the Earth?_

_And! She even had the audacity to be waiting in the hallway after my Danger Room lesson this afternoon, just pretty as you please, as though someone invited her to be in my space while I was training. And, after I'd just - _

_This house is never going to be big enough for the both of us and she just_

"-can't run away and-"

Jean's words trailed off into immediate silence as Emma pushed through the swinging doors to the kitchen, stopped herself. Raven and Jean were sitting, on stools dragged together, at the island in the center eating ice cream from bowls. The container itself sat still open between them, with the scoop abandoned inside it.

"Hey, Em," Raven offered easily. "Ice cream?"

"It's Emma." She corrected, still looking between the two, her pink lips turned into a slowly whitening line. Obviously, refusing to look chagrined about her appearance or the sudden, awkward conversation break. "Raven."

Raven shrugged, with a slightly primed expression of nonchalance, shoveling another bite of ice cream into her mouth. "Sure. Whatever. Does three people effectively make this a midnight party instead of people stealing into the kitchen?"

"I wasn't aware we had to steal anything here, during any time of day," Emma replied coolly.

Jean, who'd been trading low glances between the two and her own ice cream bowl with a small frown, interjected, "You know she didn't mean it that way." The tone of her voice made it clear the insinuation had as much to do with common sense as with other senses.

"I'm sorry. Did it look like I was asking for commentary from the peanut gallery?"

Jean's face tightened, her eyes flashing for a second a faint hazy orange-yellow at the edges of the green. But just as suddenly her hands gripped the small bowl as though a life line and she looked the opposite way.

"Emma, chill. It's been a crazy enough day already, what with the boys stupidly trashing the rec room over some video game. I don't want to have to explain to my brother about cat fights in the kitchen at two in the morning."

Emma sniffed, crossing her arms over her chest, as she flickered into being diamond form. "I could take her."

Jean hands still on the bowl of her ice cream that rather resembled bubbling soup didn't say anything, but Raven tilted her head. "Maybe. Or maybe she'll accidentally turn you into a puff of smoke."

The blond wrinkled her brow, disgusted. "She can't do that."

Emma had said it at the same time as Jean muttered, "It wasn't smoke. It was air."

Jean looked woefully put out by recognizing she'd even make this concession, while Emma looked even more taken aback by the guilty lack of defense. Leaving her to stare at both of them.

Raven stared hard at Jean's corona of red hair and her ducked face, willing her to explain for herself, before she decided to pull the foot out of her mouth she'd just shoved in all the way up to the knee. "It was just a silly mistake when she was really young. Something about manipulating-"

The sentence dangled as Raven scrunched up her face, trying to remember.

"Molecules," Jean said, after a few seconds, more to her bowl than either girl. "They asked me to chance the molecules of something. But no one remembered to suggest what I should change or what that thing should be changed it into. Until the dining room whole table vanished, and everything on it went crashing to the floor."

Raven snort, with a sly smile, "Charles totally still misses that table."

Emma Frost, on the other hand, staring at them, unblinking, didn't seem to be focusing on the table.

_August 12th_

_Everything is completely different._

_I don't know what I expected. And it's not that everyone hasn't been exceedingly kind (they really have) but there I am laying on my bed (my new bed, in a completely new room, in a completely new wing) and all I manage is bursting into tears. How pathetic is that? Failing on Day One._

_1 mean 1 knew it wouldn't be like when I was really young. It's a school now. And I knew there would be all these people. That it wouldn't be just me and Professor Xavier, Mr. Lensherr and Raven. And yet somehow. Somehow. There are so many people. So many new thoughts. People who don't know me. Who don't understand what this place means to me._

_That it gave me back my sanity. My life. If it weren't blasphemy, I'd say it was like God, giving me a new lease on life. It's not like I wasn't terrified enough that Professor Xavier talked to my parents about take down the walls he built to keep everything back, but this? This isn't like coming home._

_The building is the same but nothing else is. People going out of their way to help me, simply because I'm pretty or new, forgetting entirely that I can hear their thoughts, other students who are distrustful of me simply on the grounds of what my power is._

_That Scott boy who seems to be the Professor's new shadow. Or Hank, who just sitting near gave me a headache. Who needs quadratic equations for astronomy shoved into their head? Or Emma. Seriously. This place finally gets another girl, and she's the kind who glares at every boy for looking at her while displaying ninety percent of her chest?_

_Doesn't she get that_

"I'm not perfect."

It broke in the silence, causing Emma's shoulders to tighten, as Jean started to shift the frosty ice cream carton between her hands. "You should keep your nose out of other people's thoughts."

Jean looked chagrined, "Because you haven't been rummaging in my head all day when you could, either."

"Learn to shield better." Emma snipped.

"Ladies," Raven started again, before Jean raised a hand to stop her, sharp and sudden, as she cut in right over the blue girl.

"No. Not here." If anything Emma's words seemed to have made something of her green eyes that was both steel-boned in its defensiveness and suddenly quite soft. "It was the first lesson I learned the first time 1 came here, years ago. This is the place where I'll never have to hide who I am or apologize for what I am. Not even from another telepath."

If Raven seemed to be studying her ice cream with great intent, Emma looked a little cowed for the first time. Almost slightly jealous by way of completely unprepared for that response.

"So," Raven drawled when the silence stretched again. "If we're done showing off how much Jean's got a love affair with my brother — did you actually want some ice cream?"

"I do not!" Jean retorted, turning instantly red, if not as dark as her hair.

Emma tried to stifle a laugh, but she seemed to forget about trying not to smile. Which slipped out, tugging her lips more curved. "I should hope not. He's got the hots for Erik. Even if he won't admit it to himself. God. Can you picture that?"

"Can we not? I'm eating here," Raven said, making a disgusted face.

"If you're too grossed out, I could steal your bowl."

"Hands off, platinum princess," Raven said, clutching her bowl to her chest. The white of it contrasting sharply with the darkness of her skin even in the low lighting of the kitchen. "I know where you keep your Bieber t-shirt."

The bowl and spoon that had flown from two different parts of the room had stopped hovering in midair over the table, a side effect of Jean's sudden distraction as she, hilariously surprised, looked between Raven's pointed teasing and Emma's sudden shock.

"Oh, come on," Raven said, exaggeratedly. "It's not like she wouldn't find out at some point. We're all going to find out each other's stupidly embarrassing things sooner or later. The house is only so big."

"And so you thought you'd start with me?"

"You both already know all of my dark and dirty secrets," came the easy retort. "And, well, Jean's is easy. There'll never again be ice cream left in the fridge when you go looking for it now. She's got a killer midnight sweet tooth. She, apparently, never outgrew it. And eventually you'll end up seeing the purple lap blanket she sleeps with."

The last part came with a faint kick the stool under the redhead, who gave a tiny gasp as though not expecting that last part to come out of Raven's mouth. But she wasn't arguing the point. Choosing to press her own lips together and stir her bowl of now-melted ice cream.

"So." Raven asked again, even if it was on word.

And Jean looked over, tentatively, more than friendly. "Ice cream?"

"No." Emma told them both. Yet her shoulders relaxed.

"But I do still want some of the cake in the fridge."

_Day one down._

_Maybe my dweeb of a brother isn't too wrong about me being able to handle two other teenage girls. I don't think he had any idea what he was getting into trying to push them together, like powers or not. They'll be more like polar opposites, even if they do play nice eventually, all fire and ice. _

_Trying to outdo each other, maybe even succeeding more than they would have otherwise because of it. Maybe that was his point all along? But what I said was true. If anyone is The Princess of his Poppycock Kingdom, it's me. I was here first and all other bitches can step out of line now._

_Not that I think it really be much a problem. I think it might take some time, but still doable, you know? Jean took months to be sociable even for talking the first time she came, not that she's all catatonic this time or anything, and Emma's, well, she's still definitely warmer the longer she's been away from her family._

_It could work._

_They just need a little time._

_And barring that — there's always the bonding experience of someone trying to kill them. It totally worked for most of the boys this summer._


End file.
